New Word for Tomboy

Over at Shameless Magazine they're talking about an article in the Toronto Star called "Why 'tomboy' remains a loaded word."

The article quotes a description in the NY Times of actress Ellen Page as "a tomboy – her on-screen persona is sharp, clear-eyed, determined and self-consciously original."

Apparently a Sarah Lawrence professor wrote a response saying:

“It is unfortunate that we have no other word available to describe this strong, independent young woman than to refer to her as a tomboy. This continues to convey to girls that growing up clear-eyed and courageous is being like a boy.”

Well said!

I was the only girl on my baseball team when I was younger and have often been mistaken for a boy when I have short hair. But I can't think of an instance where I was directly called a tomboy. I definitely identified with boys when I was little and even wished to become one, but I never liked the word tomboy.

Were you ever called a tomboy? How do you feel about the term? What are other words we can use to describe strong girls? Does even having any word assume that it's unusual or unnatural for girls to be strong?

I heart Youth Radio

Just thinking today about how awesome Youth Radio is. Thanks to them, this morning on my drive to the day job, I heard some young people's reactions to the CDC study that everyone has been so shocked about the last few days.

The study claims that 1 in 4 teenage girls has a sexually transmitted disease and that the rate is close to 50% among African American young women.

My first thought: Maybe people will finally wake up and realize abstinence only programs aren't working! Maybe this will encourage more honest sex education. Maybe our country will invest in tons of prevention services and will make sure everyone has access. Maybe young people will be showered with knowledge, condoms, and everything else they need for safer sex.

My second (more realistic?) thought: Uh oh we're about to get bombarded with headlines shaming girls and calling them sluts.

My third thought: I assume all these girls aren't sleeping with each other so aren't they getting the STDs from guys? So what about them? We definitely don't need any more "CDC Shocker" scare tactic headlines about guys either, but why is all the attention and burden on the girls?

"Pregnant" Boys

What do you think about these new ads about teen pregnancy put out by One Milwaukee? Seeing an image of a teenage boy who appears to be pregnant is definitely attention getting, but I don't know if it does much more than that. And I personally wouldn't use the word "disturbing" to describe teen pregnancy.

Stacey over at Shameless has a good point: "I don’t like perpetuating this idea that if boys got pregnant, then socially we’d suddenly care about the issue."

What do you think about these ads?

More Girls Fighting?

So I'm driving to work this morning listening to Day to Day on NPR and I hear the host proclaiming,"'Fight like a girl' used to be an expression that meant you didn't fight all that hard or all that violently. Well things have changed."

My ears perk up. Did I miss something? Is this cause for celebration? Are people not using "like a girl" as an insult anymore? Welllll...not quite. The story is about videos posted on YouTube showing girls fighting each other. They say in it that girls are getting in physical fights with each other more often than in the past. Not sure what the past is to them, but I definitely remember fights among girls when I was in middle and high school. But maybe it is getting more common. What do you think?

There was one part of the story that was especially annoying. Dr. Louis Kraus at Rush University says, "We see more girls interacting in competitive sports. We've seen girls get into more fights." Are we supposed to draw some connection between girls being more involved in sports and getting in more fights? What happened to sports being so good for girls?

And then they talk to a thirteen-year-old who says, "Guys aren't better than girls. Girls can fight too." Ah equality at last. But seriously let's strive for no fighting.

Oh but the Dr. Kraus guy brings up a good point at the end about how schools are less likely to take fights among girls as seriously as fights among guys. Teachers and administrators often see girls' fights as "skirmishes" and are less likely to intervene. Hopefully awareness will do a little something to help people not diminish girls' activities and expressions (however unacceptable).

“Chaste but Chic?” Gimme a break.

Have you been hearing about this so-called “modesty movement?” Of course I’m all for providing alternatives to Bratz style clothes (have you seen the latest Sticker Sisters t-shirts?), but this “modesty movement” makes me gag.

They’re trying to push a "chaste but chic" dress code on girls. Not surprising that this movement is connected to faith-based organizations and abstinence only advocates. But perhaps the scariest part is that the mother of the modesty movement, Wendy Shalit, is still trying to blame sexual harassment and rape on women’s "lack of modesty." And here I thought we were past that ridiculous idea that a women is "asking for it" if she wears a short skirt. Ugh.

Ann Ream (founder of Voices and Faces Project) says it well in the LA Times:

"Scratch the surface [of the modesty movement], and what's supposed to be good for girls reveals itself to be all about the boys: dressing in a way that doesn't over-excite them, demurring so that their manhood remains intact and holding tight to our sexuality until we find a husband who is worthy of that ultimate 'prize.'"

More
LA Times: "The false modesty movement"
Talk of the Nation: "Modern Girls and the Modesty Movement"

Middle School Flashback (but in a good way)

This summer has been one middle school flashback after another. But luckily they’ve all been good! I met Hillary Carlip who wrote the book Girl Power and I saw Team Dresch perform. Reading material and music that helped me survive middle school.

But the coolest flashback has been getting a copy of Belle magazine. The magazine was started by Kelcie Angstadt when she was 13 years old (she’s now 15). It totally made me think of how I wanted to write a zine when I was 13, but didn’t feel ready to put my opinions out there with my writing. I ended up starting Sticker Sisters instead, which helped me find my voice in a different way. But I love seeing girls express themselves through writing.

The July/August issue of Belle has an article about how to "Be Green" and a quiz asking, "Do you care what other people think?" The title of the quiz might not sound that different from mainstream teen magazines, but the advice at the end sure is! It celebrates individualism and offers suggestions for getting away from today's "fashion-obsessed" society.

In an article on "The Great Debate about Weight," Kelcie writes:

"We are all different sizes, and I hope that I live long enough to see an era where women can be proud of that fact, not hide from it. If we accept that we are different, it will dissolve those thoughts in the back of our mind, like 'She's so much prettier than I am' or 'I wish I looked that good in a bikini.' Why focus on thoughts like that when they only bring you down. It doesn’t help anyone, and especially not you. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and if you train yourself to refocus that eye, you’ll see that you are beautiful, size zero or not."

Powerful words. Keep an eye on Belle—in a few years it just might give Bitch and Bust a run for their money!

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